Tears

Leonora gazed morosely at the ceiling. Then she reached out for her glass of wine and had another slurp.

When she had finished the glass of wine she turned over onto her side and curled up in a tiny ball. Well, tiny-ish.

Meanwhile, out in the hall, the little crutches were very quiet. They strained their ears and heard strange noises.

'Waaaaaaaaah,' wailed Leonora, sobbing away like a child to herself. 'Waaaaaaaaah. A booo hooo hooo.'

Little crutch number one decided it was its responsibility as self-appointed leader to say something.

'Leonora?' it said. (Number one was a crutch of few words.)

'Are you all right?' added little crutch number two who also wanted to be in charge. Even though it was clear Leonora was not all right. Little crutch number one raised its eye at such a fatuous question.

Little crutch number three considered asking if she was crying about Leonard, but was beginning to realise that mentioning Leonard equalled a swift kick and a crash to the floor.

Numbers four and five hadn't got a clue what to say.

The loud sobs stopped. Leonora got up from her sofa, picked up her glass, and walked out into the hall.

'Thank you,' she said. 'I'll be OK.' Even though it was clear to all of them that she wouldn't be.

And she wandered into the kitchen and poured another glass of wine then went back to lie on the sofa and gaze morosely at the ceiling again.

The little crutches were worried. They didn't know what to do to help. They chattered amongst themselves in low voices. Although the obvious theory was that she was upset by the 'phone call from Mark, they all had to agree with little crutch number three that the cause was more likely to be Leonard.

Not that he had done anything, but he didn't need to do anything to upset Leonora. In fact, what he didn't do was just as likely to upset her. And what he hadn't done, was get in touch, whereas Mark had.

In truth, that was exactly why Leonora was crying. She hated herself for wishing it was Leonard who had called and not Mark. There was nothing wrong with Mark, he was a nice guy, and she liked him.

So why was she crying about Leonard?

Leonard, who was someone else's husband.

Leonard, who even when he had been briefly single, was never without a woman.

Leonard, who spent most of his time insulting her - but could be irresistibly charming when he wanted.

Leonard, who laughed at her, but who had seemed to care about her at one point.

Leonard - who just didn't want her in his life any more.

If someone else had described the same situation to her, her advice would have been succinct. Forget about him, he's not worth it, and he doesn't care about you.

She knew that was the right thing to do, but why couldn't she do it?

And why, when she had a chance to pick up again with a decent thoughtful man, was she still thinking about her callous selfish cousin? She realised she needed to focus on his bad points (there were lots), and stop thinking about the good times and how much she missed him.

With that, she fell asleep.